Top Ten Signs That Your Are About To Be Fired By CIRCA
10. Whenever you ask the training co-ordinator a question, he says "Forget
it. It's nothing *you* need to worry about."
9. The supervisors notice that you post an average of one Top Ten for every
5 minutes during the time you're supposed to be working.
8. Ann Snowberger calls you into her office. When you get there, she is
sitting at her desk, flanked by 2 armed guards.
7. Something bad happens and they have no evidence at all against any person
in particular....Oh, wait, that's one of the Top Ten Signs That You're
About To Get Kicked Out Of Housing.
6. Your account gets taken off the CIROP mailing list.
5. 'A Current Affair' reveals you as the source for it's story 'CSE 211:
Harmless Computer Lab, or Satan's Appliance Factory?'
4. Permanent open shifts start appearing on OASIS, and they all coincide
with the hours you work.
3. You turn in a status sheet with the following entries:
--9:35: Terminal O-5 emitting smoke.
--9:40: Terminal O-5 clearly on fire.
--9:45: Fire spread to all of Row O.
--9:50: Fire out of control. Rows K-O all in flames.
--9:55: Multiple users complaining about fire. Sent them to CSE 520.
-10:00: Moved op terminal over to left side of op station to prevent
it from catching fire while I logged out on OASIS.
2. The Alligator publishes your letter to the editor complaining that CIRCA
is drastically underfunded, as evidenced by the fact that they have to
make unlicensed copies of WordPerfect to save money, so they can fund
their secret terrorist organization.
1. When you walk into Sarah's office, she pulls out a gun and says, with a
glazed look in her eyes, "This is the 3rd week in a row you forgot to
fill out your time card. I must terminate you now."
MBBS/Board 12/CIRCA: "Roll 1d8 to find out how many semesters you get
to work before we fire you." 8)
(VENKMAN, CIROP35 - 9/14/93)
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