Top Ten Reasons Skippy Works on His Homepage So Much

10. Nobody has yet told him that the Pulitzer prize doesn't have a category
     for hypertext.

 9. In case the Borg ever access it, he has to change it faster than they
     can adapt.

 8. The MAC in his office can carry on a much more animated conversation than
     either of his roommates.

 7. He figures the bigger his home page is, the less likely that someone will
     stumble across the secret personal bookmark page he put in there. (http:
     //grove.ufl.edu/~locutus/porn_menu.html)

 6. He heard Mirsky's been eyeing it, and he's been making constant 
     improvements ever since.

 5. Does the phrase 'Absolute gobs of free time' mean anything to you?

 4. Needs something else to think about so he won't be tempted to go out and
     buy the new 'Baywatch Barbie'.

 3. He's still trying to get himself listed in Yahoo's index under the
     heading 'Miscellaneous Crap'.

 2. He doesn't actually work on his home page at all.  It updates itself, as
     part of a deal he made with Satan...he traded his soul for the home page,
     a nice trust fund, and a supermodel to be named later.

 1. Being in his office late at night give him the opportunity to use that
     'special' peripheral he got from Big Wanda's House O' *Really* Hard
     Disks.

MBBS/Board 12/Skippy's Home Page:  "Responsible for over 16,000 man-hours
				    of lost productivity since 1991."


User: VENKMAN
Date: 26-Jul 06:39 PM  806783981